A Follow Up to Week 39

I feel it is necessary to again express our gratitude for all of the support we've received from family and friends. We are healing emotionally and physically, and while it is time that is necessary for the healing to take place, time will not answer our questions or cure our uncertainties. We still don't know why this happened, and will never know for sure. We will never know if the baby was a boy or a girl. And we won't know if this will happen next time until we find the courage to try again.

Over the past couple of days we've received numerous messages from people sharing similar stories. We've heard about early miscarriages, miscarriages close to the baby's due date, single miscarriages, multiple miscarriages, miscarriages to one twin, miscarriage of a set of triplets, and 7 miscarriages in less than a year and a half. Some of these stories we already knew about and we were able to reach out to these couples to answer our questions and for support that others didn't know how to give to us.

But most of these stories we were hearing for the first time. I'm not sure why it is so taboo to say that you've had a miscarriage unless it is shared with someone who has also miscarried. It's so puzzling to me. Now that we've become part of this "secret society" we're priviledged to hear about others' stories. It has shown us that miscarriages are far more common than we ever thought and we are now part of this community that many people we know, including friends, family, co-workers, and even one of my doctors, are part of. It has been theraputic to write about our experience and hearing about the experience of others helps to put things in to perspective.

When we began this blog back in April we knew that it would open up our lives to everyone and we were okay with that and still are. We've always wanted to be a source of support for a family in need, and still do. While the experiences may have changed, our candidness has not. We respect people who wish for their lives to remain private, but also feel for them and hope that they are receiving the support they need. It is difficult to place your faith and trust in others; I know this all too well. There will indeed be some feelings of disappointment at times because not everyone will rise to the challenge. But for the most part I've found that people want to help, you just need to give them a chance. That is what we are doing now, and in return, we will help others when they are in need.

On a positive note, next week's post will be our 100th post!  So much has happened and we've come a long way since that first post back on Saturday, April 17, 2010.  Looking forward to more great things to come!

DC